Please stop trying to convince people that you're retarded and I suck your dick in the same conversation.
i keep myself tagged when other girls look bad/ugly so i look better
the line at the liquor store is out the door, and students in line are high-fiving like crazy...i love college snow days
That's the last time we joust in Radio Flyer wagons after margarita night.
Stop selling my mother weed! She's annoying as hell when she's stoned.
She said she couldn't find my penis because my arm was in the way. That was my penis
Every man deserves at least one moment like that
Did I tell you I had a charge show up for $36 on a credit card I haven't used in 6 months from Wild Wings? It was that night we slept across the street from the bar.
Take advantage man but know that every anal bead u drop inside her will make her love u 2% more. It's science
Like, I just want to be naked rolling around in soft things.
Jameson and I invented street rugby last night. Yeah
I just found a video of you asking to be a whale with me.
I didn't think I was even that high but when we were standing in the cop car's headlights I totally forgot how to use my arms
I couldn't find a water bottle, so I sent her to school with her juice in a flask. Who the hell let me become a parent?
Thanks for wearing matching bob ross shirts to the bar with me and referring to every guy as a happy little accident
so let me get this straight you just stared at his boner all night?
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