just saw Chris Hanson on the street. looked immediately around for video cameras. why is that my immediate reaction?
eric is really sick so I'm taking care of him! :(
just blow him with soup in your mouth.
you googled " I want to buy a live ostrich". I'd say you were pretty wasted.
It's 3am, i just got back from ht e bars and registered for classes larteeeeee. History of baseball at 8am? at least ill meet the only stragiht gusy at NYU!
you kept screaming i cant feel my vagina, it kinda killed the mood.
Don't let the fact that shes seen my penis discourage you
After the second day the hotel realized I wasn't responsible enough to have a comforter, so they took it for the rest of the trip.
Call me when you get up. This hang-over is like dismantling a bomb: I need someone to talk me through it.
Just stared at a tree for a solid 5 minutes because I thought a German Shepard was perched on a limb.
It was almost as bad as the time I peed on the floor of the Pentagon's subway station.
i was trying to figure out what "tidy fucking" was when i realized he meant "titty fucking" and i need to start banging smarter people....
My life is a clusterfuck of men and disorderly priorities right meow.
I couldn't break up with him while I was wearing a Hakuna Matata shirt.
Well he offered to lick my asshole so...I'm not really worried about his interest level.
Help I can't tell if I'm sexually attracted to Bill Nye
Oh.
You came to the right person.
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