Jenna and Ryan are ranting and raving about child custody. MY VASECTOMY SMILES.
At what point should shame kick in? Realising I had a one night stand with a man engaged or realising I am that man's wedding photographer?
Good news.. I found out what I did Saturday night. Bad news... I found out what I did Saturday night.
if u cant get laid at this wedding we need to have a looooooong talk about the possibility of u becoming a lesbian
My god. We'll be gay porn millionaires.
He sent me an email apologizing for sleeping with her...and by that I mean he sent a picture of his dick to my school e-mail
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
there is a money trail leading from my bathroom to my living room.. the trail ends with a half eaten bag of chips with a note that says "magical chipz".. who am i?
I just watched the lion king for the first time in years. It's like the equivalent of a really good blow job.
It's like leaving me for his wife wasn't enough. He had to give me an STD too.
YOU DID DRUGS AFTER A THREESOME WHO ARE YOU TO JUDGE ME?!!?
I just tripped out to the Angel of Music from Phantom of the Opera in my car. Wayyyy to high for shuffle right now.
Some girl took her panties off, soaked them in vodka and wrung them out into a line of guys' mouths! Awesome!
No, NOT awesome. Where the fuck do you go drinking!?!
The last thing I remember about last night was guzzling white zinfandel out of the box and eating cheese. And I was thinking OH YOU FANCY HUHHH
don't think less of me for this, but i'm pretty sure he did a line off my boob last night.
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