i just google searched "what time does taco bell open"
they got in a fight during sex...she came out yelling and covered in chocolate
New life rule, no banging opera singers. I might be a little deaf now
Hot freshmen.....hot freshmen chicks everywhere
You say this every welcome week, bro.
I found his Linkedin the day after he created it. Too stalkerish or just right?
It's times where you wake up in the hospital after trying to road surf that you wonder what you're doing in life.
DON'T WEAR PANTS.
I REPEAT.
DO. NOT. WEAR. TROUSERS.
COME HERE WE MELTED A CORONA BOTTLE WITH FIREWORKS
I no longer believe that the road to self esteem is through his penis.
Well I'll be shitfaced all day the 4th in honor of this great nation... but I'm down for drunken camping/nature fucking on the 5th
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
How do you say "thats kinda illegal" in thai?
She asked for references to decide whether she wanted to have sex with me. And she was serious.
George disappeared two hours ago with a stripper named "delicious." Haven't seen him since
I had a rough night. I'm just gonna lay here and masturbate for a while before I have to go adult.
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