we dont do blackfin have a good night :)
Those former-lesbian gone white-trash bars always seem to be your favorite.
I walk in to see her roommate half naked on their stripper pole. I knew I was home.
Ok, so for future reference, in Rome, "piano bar" means "brothel".
I wish you would always start your sentences with "speaking of my clit..."
He put used condom on the handle of the plunger in the bathroom.
I spiked my fruit smoothie. Taking bikini season diet to a whole new level
I definitely hasselhoffed a taco bell burrito on my kitchen floor in front of my dad and little brother.
I guess when I black out I feel that it's not inappropriate to grope my gf in front of her parents.... But hey at least I'm starting off 2013 single
I know. I feel like I should be doing mature responsible adult things though. Like getting loans, working 60 hours every week and not eating burritos in bed, ya know?
He tried to reenact Braveheart's freedom scream but got tackled by his drunk roommate who thought he was yelling that the handle he was holding up was free.
I think it's gonna be hard to find a guy that won't take my consistent drinking as alcoholism
Apparently I called him, said "vodka" and then hung up on him.
I finished masturbating now I'm eating french toast crunch. What is life, and what are friends.
I was desperate and wasn't about to let my cereal get soggy so I ate it on the toilet. Don't let me repeat last night.
Randomize
