apparently i tried to put my coat in the microwave.
We're watching an ocean show on Discovery Channel and drinking every time they say "dolphins." PS. Seals kill birds. Tell all your friends.
I wonder what it would be like to go to the dry cleaners and not have to inform them that all my clothes are stained with booze.
I head back to the dorms in less than a week I'm not ready to see my roomate naked that much again.
I may or may not be negotiating a deal of baked goods for socks...keep you posted
BGSU move in weekend. Just passed a house w a beer pong table set up, ppl already playing, girls holding signs that say "son drop off". It's 10:30 am.
Let's not fuck on an air mattress tonight...I'd rather get rug burn.
If you call getting home safe by sprinting down Spanish Harlem barefoot still rolling then ya I made it
I just got three pairs of underwear free and a bathing suit for $20 by modeling them and letting the salesman grope me a bit.
It's great being a young gay man in Chicago!
why do all the dudes in this porno look like billy ray cyrus
I tried smoking while wearing a horse mask, it was the worst thing I've ever smelled
I wish I had a clear image of the dude who was sucking on my tit outside the bar last night
I am in the parking lot of CVS in Auburn. I think a truck full of Plan B and regret just arrived.
Don’t drink the Bloody Mary - it’s vodka and salsa.
It’s a prereq for med school, so I hope the professor likes blow jobs
Randomize
