the third sister isn't as attractive as the other two but I will do her anyway to finally pull off the fabled family hat trick.
I knew I shouldn't have slept with her...my dick looks like a stegosaurus tail
Do you ever just KNOW it's gonna be a good day? I mean, like in a "just found a Vicodin in the bottom of your purse" kinda way?
so, not only did she give him head while i was asleep next to them, apparently, it was bad head...
Are you serious?
yeah... as often as she does that, you'd think she'd be good at it...
Pregnancy confirmed. Complete emotional instability achieved. I just cried through 95% of Avatar.
He picked me up went to throw me on his bed. I landed on the wood frame. That's how I broke my rib. We still fucked. Thanks tequila. Best injury ever
I really think that guy just walks around with tennis balls in his pocket. No dick is that big
When you give the bridesmaid toast someday at my wedding I need you to quote Ricky Bobby in some form. And slip in your sister has the vagina of awesomeness. That is all.
and then we all passionately sang "what if god was one of us" until everyone passed out in the grass
You told me my blanket felt like ground beef.
Sorry for all the snapchats, I wanted you to feel like u were in America getting plastered with me
Called Apple, my penis pics are safe.
I ate 1200 calories worth of chocolate covered marshmallows and googled why it is okay to be single forever
My sexual preferences tend to require a degree in psychology to understand
I can get something to clone your cock for $40. It's worth it. It's my birthday present to myself.
OMG I CAN GET A GLOW-IN-THE-DARK ONE
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