But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
One minute shes telling me about her volunteer work then she whips out a 12 inch dildo
is it gross that my labia hangs so much that guys can't find my clit?
Next weekend I am getting a library card and staying my whore ass home.
I think for all the guys in my phone, I'm going to change their pictures to pics of their dicks. It's easier to identify them that way.
When you sober up and come in here, I'm in your bed because you pissed on me in mine. So fuck. Off.
Weekend plan is a big bag of dope, delivery food, Bollywood marathon and masterbating my dick raw.
Why are you there anyways?
Pickin up ball pit balls from craigslist
ever had one of those days where you say fuck it and lick the inside of a bag of chips
You went to the animal party as a hoodrat. You won the most creative costume contest.
You can't just take out your bong for hits in public places... That's what pipes are for. You've got to be stealthier.
No, it's okay because this is the city of trees.
YOU'VE ALREADY BEEN BUSTED MORE THAN ONCE. THAT'S NOT A VALID EXCUSE FOR BONG HITS IN COFFEE GARDEN
what's the least obnoxious place that i could barf on the bus?
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
Oh you know just explaining sexual consent to a drunk 80 year old man. How is this my life?
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
