Someone's got a whale tail
A thong is hangin out?
No, a fatty following them
she bought me drinks at the bar, made me pizza at her place, gave me head, and then drove me home...i think i might propose
We planned for the zombie apocalypse. In great detail. Of course there was booze involved.
of all places to pass out....why right in front of our RA's door? OF ALL PLACES.
It was one of those "I have no idea if this will ever happen again so I can't say no" opprotunities. Part of me was like, "You slut" and the bigger part was screaming, "Hell yeah"
Hey, I didn't ask that stripper to put her unds in my mouth, it was just covered by the plus package fee I ordered.
I'll be there in 10. I need you naked and ready. Warm up.
No padding. I spent my whole summer with my nips out. October don't need that too.
hey, being drunk and dumb is my thing. Don't take that away from me.
was I really that bad?
you army crawled across the kitchen floor, turned the cat into "super kitty" and crawled into the dog cage
When I said to give it to me hard and fast, I didn't mean like 15 seconds fast.
Is it wrong that I want to do a nude photo shoot with nothing but a light saber?
You're seeing with your vagina, not your eyes.
I did cocaine off my boobs last night. Then I wrote two essays and went on a run. Go me
You ever feel like just rubbing your face in everything like a dog?
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