TYLER... glimpse of last night: leather chaps, guacamole dip, a jump rope, spray paint, and rhinestone studded pajamas.
i think you have the wrong number... but your story sounds delightful.
watching E! true Hollywood story: curse of the lottery.. i'd probably spend all my money on blow and airplanes too..
Oh. Thats cool. Im not dating anyone right now. Sean gave me chlamydia from some GUY he fooled around with. Im being abstinent.
Did you know they have alcohol AND weed delivery in Canada??? I'm not EVER coming home
I'm telling everyone at work the mark on my neck is a hickey but really I was taking a shit while straightening my hair and burned myself
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Well now that I've given all the athletes mono there goes our chance of winning any conference championship
I just found out my mom named me after her fake ID from college...
drunk taco night MLK would want it this way.
Sorry about bonging beers with your mom but in all fairness you were late...
I'm getting the lip of my vagina pierced & you expect ME to be the voice of reason?
Just watched a guy ride a bike off his roof into his pool. On my way to the liquor store, picking you up in 20
You're gonna be proud in the future that you fucked the next bill gates
Because sadly the idea of me having a girlfriend is crazy enough to be an April fools prank
I accepted my type is not "conventionally attractive" when she asked me "Him? Are you sure?" 5 times in front of him last night
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