I hate you, and I hope you have babies soon that you love very much. Then I will steal them and feed them to sharks, and you will be so heart broken that you never want to have any more kids and you'll just hide out in a dark room all day wondering how someone could feed another persons babies to sharks.
I just googled "semen solvent" and got nothing. there has to be something that will wash this shit off!
I see a marketing opportunity
the lady at Walgreens winked at me when i asked where the cherry chapstick was... damn u katy perry!
I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
you kept falling over in mid-conversation and you just got right back up as if nothing happened...
For once I'm glad there wasn't morning sex. Yes, that sore from the night before.
I'm having post traumatic stress flashbacks of last night. That big. Don't know whether to call him again or change my name...
I stumbled into my living room at 4 a.m. to find him hurling my laptop across the room and his pants around his ankles. Clearly his night didn't go as planned.
is it bad that I didn't wash the cum out of my hair because it keeps my curls intact?
Maybe its all the xanax she takes but she literally has NO shame
Most violent shit of my life. New Years resolution of eating better is already kicking me in the face.
On another note, why did I wake up wrapped in bubble wrap. I can only assume it was for my own safety
That's the point dumbass, I can't use my boss as a reference cause they'd have to fucking call him in prison.
Ecstasy body chair massage shower sex fest this week?
I'm mentally preparing myself to hang out with him by staring into the mirror saying "thou shalt not get naked" over and over.
Randomize
