someone is gonna have my baby tonight. they just dont know it yet
I'll alert the authorities
so... my grandma just told me i should be a stripper
well at least shes not calling you fat anymore
heading to class now, facing the weekend consquences
should i be impressed or disgusted that i was spitting glow-in-the-dark?
At one point I was giving him a handjob and I started singing Call Me Maybe
According to the red cross, I'm not suppose to do anything strenuous for the next 24 hours. That means you're on top.
Faking my way through an entire party as a British exchange student. Wish me luck.
This question may sound intrusive, but how did pushing out a baby affect your vagina?
As you passed out you started to cry and say "Mufasa" over and over again making everyone else cry.
side note: on a scale of 1-10, how bad an idea is it to hook up with 9 cats guy?
I came in like 30 seconds, and my dog got to watch me take the walk of shame to the bathroom to clean up. All in all, not my best performance.
I just made myself orgasm twice and Laura lee hit 4 million subscribers. It’s a good day everywhere
Laying on my driveway in my pajamas in the sun having my severe hangover cigarette, and the daycare house across the street is having playtime in the yard! I believe I'm currently being what's known as a "bad example!"
I just want to feed you taquitos and play with your boner and live happily ever after
Who brings a stripper to breakfast at the dining hall? What was the plan? Impress her with his meal plan?
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