i know ur right I'm sorry I'm stupid and incompitent look I can't even spell incompetent right! Fuck!
You just made me feel so damn special
pwbgyin
what?
penguin condom
There is something about drinking on a golf course and getting with younger women that just really makes me feel at home.
On ecstasy, in Ikea. this is incredible.
I think god is proud of me so he is rewarding me in discounted wine
she was drinking until 3, woke up at 7, shouted 'I'M STILL DRUNK" and went out for a jog in her thong
Well the walls are thin and I can hear the couple next door having sex. I think their dog is somehow involved.
He is the blood diamond of hook ups. You think you want it...but you don't
Wow I didn't even consider the possibility of him having ED. I'm gaining so many life experiences from dating an older man
i know i saw many looks of jealousy when i walked solo into subway carrying a cheesy gordida crunch after taco bell closing hours
I'm sure for most of the people, it was the one and only miracle they will see
Sometimes you have a glimmer of a heart and then I immediately remember you are dead inside.
I'm a grown ass woman. Treat me like one. Fuckboy
Now after not puking, next step is not to do the accent when immigration says "hello."
I just want a guy who makes lots of money, has a skilled penis and the sex drive of a 22 year on Viagra. Is that too much to ask?
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