i don't think my family understands the severity of a twenty first birthday.
Whats a good hint for stop bitching im gonna give you head
i jus dunped the rest of my drink down the sink and tool my bra off. pretty sure this is the best decision for everybody.
the realtor just asked me if i've ever made meth on this property.... i need to do something about my hair
The pet store wouldn't sell us fish because they said they could tell we were drunk.
i looked up and she was looking over the stall watching me pee and told me to unlock the door. that dedicated to sucking my dick.
I would call you but I don't feel like these hands belong to me.
If you two are having sex, stop. I have something really important to ask you about psychics.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
I was trying to climb into what I thought was a bunk bed.. Turns out it was just a cabinet under the sink in a bathroom
I just wanted to warn you I have strep throat incase I gave it to that guy we both hooked up with on New Years.
I cancelled the entertainment for your b-day party.... Keep the bouncy castle just in case.
I've had sex near too many of the blankets to let our parents touch them like this
She threw my purse across the room almost broke a lamp and this all started bc she forgot what an air mattress was
Seriously. There were about 4 hours in which I swear my nose was not attached to my face.
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