On a scale from 0 to 24...wait, 3 to 24, where 6 is the lowest and 12 is the highest, how freaking high re you right now?
Walk of Shame. In a state park.
he told my vagina that he was looking forward to meet it
I just peeled a layer of cum off my eyelid. Don't even tell me that's not why you came over
i can't remember the last friday i didn't spend in the foetal position
I just wanted to let you know that this afternoon I took a piss at the same toliet you drank out of on New Years Eve.
Finals are done.. I just wanna get drunk and pretend I'm a seahorse.
It's called "lets see how many European capitals we can do the walk of shame through in one year"
No he can't help me find his house he is strapped to a stretcher facing the opposite direction
He's only done it missionary. His world is about to be rocked. Do you know what I look like from behind?
She has dubbed herself the Pied Piper of Penis and keeps yelling about getting Cocktober started... Will send pix soon
I tried to find an emoji but none convey my excitement for receiving good sex soon
Bleach your asshole, I'm on my way.
Who is this?!?!
some guy had a sword and everyones crying..it turned bad..fast.
Is it bad form to puke out of a dorm window to avoid looking bad in front of the people in your room?
How about from a sixth floor window?
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