Turns out you're obligated under man law to share any passwords you may have for porno sites
Is that what they're teaching u at that bar review class?
so i think im going to actually use my calories on food today instead of beer.
There are no words to adequately express my gratitude for sending me porn you found staring a former classmate.
She gave 2 thumbs up when Nirvana came on the radio while blowing me in the bathroom
I need to get a life, I am either crying at every glee episode or just wanting to blow rails off photos of us
Half way through sex he whispered in my ear, " your the second best I've ever had" then proceeded to tell me to sit on his face.
Did I run away from you last night?
Yeah it was a great moment for our friendship
i actually texted him "nice to see you" but then there was a saved draft "i think about you when i get off." dodged that bullet...
So we became Pizza Strippers- we stripped and asked for slices of pizza in return.
should i save it for someone special or be a feminist and be like "my vagina doesnt define me"
sometimes you just gotta eat tacobell at 2am and cry all your feelings out
He said his fantasy involved both of us fucking while stuffed into the same overalls
not sure what stings more, my ass or my pride...
She's seen your dick through your pants. You don't need to ask
Just found a pair of vomit-soaked socks in my purse, three days after the party... Now I know why my wallet was wet.
Randomize
