My mom's crying. That means it must be Christmas.
Dude they have ski ball. Anywhere that has skiball is bound to be bangin.
she added emergen-c to the bong-water bro, brilliant.
After we fucked he shhhh'd me and said your welcome
Announcement: Given the sad circumstances regarding the death of my dearest friend Chong the Bong, there will be a brief memorial service for him tomorrow evening at 10:30 at my place. After sharing some memories and sending his spirit off to the great bowl in the sky, we will all take place in the commemoration and maiden voyage of his son, Chong Squared, who eagerly waits to meet all of you. High blessings to you all, piece be with you.
I whipped my shit out and she just stared at it with a mean face. It was like a face off in a heavyweight boxing fight.
Ok, they now been on the roof for two days. I can see 4 cases of teecate and a carton of smokes. They are yelling at "fucking fall" and pissing off the roof.
This is it. This is the birthday cake that gets me laid.
He's been pretending to be gay for 3 months in order to get free weed.
YOU SLEPT WITH A GUY WHO HAS A BILLBOARD IN HIS HONOR?
My ex boyfriend literally just asked "who needs porn?". This is EXACTLY why I dumped his ass.
no real plans this weekend. trying to derail the alcohol induced fucking hell train I've been riding for the past three weeks.
I'm too depressed to drink my wine. That is what I would call a serious problem
His relationship is over as soon as he sees my boobs. I’m going to titty fuck my way into his heart
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
Randomize
