I could hear his roommate in the background imitating my sex sounds...
If I squint, he looks like Jude Law. But that's kind of a weird face to make during sex.
He has a landing strip. I repeat he has shaven himself a landing strip. HELPPPP!
Im in the bathtub drunk. Less than an hour before the interview. This will be the best or worst career move ever., support?
I'm so hungover all I can do is stare at my curser and hope it starts moving on its own
And on the seventh day, God carefully sculpted your cock to fit perfectly into my masterpiece of a vagina. Then he rested. Look it up.
Winner winner, chicken dinner. I am the sole survivor of the orgy without strep. Or maybe I was the carrier?
pretty sure tht was the guy who once went to the club dressed as waldo. he still looks weirdly fuckable.
I saw a kitty kat get finger blasted on the couch by a Bulls player
His 12 year old sister has bigger boobs than me and now that's all I can think about when we have sex
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
That’s true love. If they recognize a chocolate mold of your anus.
Just seriously saw this chick say, watch this motherfuckers then did a 42 sec keg stand.
You at least asked for her number right?
I woke up to the smell of shame and vomit in my hair... went to the bathroom to shower and passed out... woke back up naked with the blow dryer on... thanks for making my birthday a success
Imagine we only get one cock for the rest of your life. I’d pick his dick. That good!
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