I felt like Norm from Cheers walking into the free clinic.
He looks like Spencer from the game Dreamphone
we convinced you the moon was a planet...again
Come 10 years my vagina won't look like this. I must cherish it
Out of all the things I've put my penis in, this seems the most unfortunate.
She deep throated me and when I woke up she made me pizza. I was full of emotions I started to cry.
She had the hiccups when she was giving me head. It was actually pretty awesome
I'm going to need to borrow your helmet cam for my Wednesday night blackouts.
I feel like I owe it to them to wear pants.
What can I say? When alcohol is my motivation, I can move mountains.
I asked my boss to leave early for a booty call. She said yes. See.... everyone sees it's important I get laid.
On the way home there was a guy passed out IN the road on Colfax with his pants around his ankles, completely bare assed. If he was dressed as a speed bump, he succeeded.
Beyoncé wouldn't let anything bad happen here
I'm actually kind of scared about the prospect of us living together. We're just going to eat pizza and drink wine before retiring to our rooms with vibrators
Nothing has ever been more true. Ever.
Alcohol and IMDB don't always mix with 100% accuracy
Randomize
