actually, I'm a sock model
I am not having having sex with guys at the moment.
I can pretend to be a girl if you want. I have a tongue.
I don't know which is worse: knowing all the free porn websites, or knowing which days they update their free porn.
You guys seriously fuck to bieber? That's embarrassing...
They'd unbutton the overalls with their lesbian-tongues. It wouldn't even be a problem.
I am making a budget for 2012. Should condoms be in the insurance or entertainment category?
"drunk introduce yourself to everyone colleen" came out last night... you kept grabbing guys faces that you just met and just kept saying their names over and over and over again so you wouldn't forget.. then would see them 5 minutes later to introduce yourself again..
i can't invite random hot hobos into my aunt's house.
You asked me if I was judging you for being drunk, and if I can hypnotize you make sober.
This heat and humidity do not mix with these braless DDs and a tank top at a BBQ.
Happy birthday and sorry I punched your friend in the face
I forgot wine drunk hurts
i woke up half naked on someone's pool lounge chair in a house that i don't know, with someone's phone number scrawled on my stomach. why do i hang out with you again??
You just listed two reasons.
Just boned her on my desk. on top of my term paper. take that professor dipshit
Went to the party dressed like a Cougar and brought a twenty something dressed as Micheal Phelps home. So far I’m loving being divorced. :-)
Randomize
