College reaches a new low. We just carved a shot glass out of a potatoe.
I saw his dick soo much last night when I saw him this morning all I saw was penis where his face should be
Also thongs make me have to fart a lot.
I just dont think you can meet a stranger after youve heard them cum through the walls though
What can I say, we hook up during the holidays.. We're a seasonal couple
Going to have to start putting down newspaper if puking the bed is going to be a habit
i think i traded my wallet for a tim hortons gift card.
Drinking franzia alone at noon watching a cheese themed episode of "The Chew" I'm ready to admit I need a job.
What should we drink tonight, I'm in the mood to be judged
Well, I've taken the art of car peeing to new heights
She tried to sing jingle balls while blowing me
I'm torn between regretting everything and regretting nothing.
So I was walking to the bathroom and some random dude threw up while walking towards me. He kept eye contact the entire time and didn't stop moving.
I often wonder if we’re introverted extroverts, but I don’t think so. I think we’re just easily tired scumbags
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
