with her its the mind over matter factor, i dont mind and she dont matter
Hey baby girl when you gonna let my tongue get up in that ass like i'm an explorer trying to go deep under on a quest for the lost city of atlantis
your text was fucking rediculious. Will let you eat my asshole though.
is it wrong that i plan on stealing a few pipecleaners from my preschool classroom to clean my bowl?
it'll be like the batcave but for manwhores
I think you'll appreciae more than anyone that I'm renting my parking spot out for a half gallon of vodka a month.
Two cats fucking in the middle of the street. I sat there and watched in my car because I didn't want to cock block the male by honkin my horn.
At least I had a $10 coupon for Plan B today. Smart shopping for bad decisions
No, gay couples have the same problems straight ones do; I wish that we could go back to the days when he would shit with the door closed.
I think he's like Cher he's going to live forever but not as scary looking
look, my penis is an amusement park, and it's closed for maintenance. why can't you just accept that?
When I meet her I'm going to have to resist the urge of saying "hey! We're Eskimo sisters!"
Can I just swipe right on his dad?
You passed out in my backseat like a legitimate infant. A really drunk, really horny infant
My co-worker accidentally texted me regarding the threesome him and other one are planning.
I'll bring spiced rum
I am not drinking that devil juice
Randomize
