You're completely useless in the revolution.
its like whenever the snow comes all the hott girls drop out of school. where are they
Girl next to me just ralphed in a bag. Congrats class of 2010
Just to clear things up. I did not walk in on him jacking off to your facebook profile.
We are lost and the only things we have are peanut brittle, cookies and vodka. I think we'll make it.
I officially became the girl who let a guy get her off under the covers last night while her roommate and a friend were there. He was impressed by my ability to stay quiet and stay relatively focused on the conversation...
I am so ashamed of you, and yet so proud.
We need to play Chardee MacDennis. Contact me when you have an available date. This is not a question.
I just almost said to a customer "P as in Pussy"
Who says there aren't gentlemen anymore? My one night stand warmed up my car for me
Im hitting on this chick at a stoplight when all the sudden. i notice this chick blowing some dude in the backseat.
not sure when or how we ended up at this wedding party but you need to be here they are handing out screwdrivers and Yamakas to everyone and it's a got damn open bar you need to be here now
Also day 6: dick is healed and ready to go back to work.
I just met him at a place called the meat farm, Jesus be a shield.
We are gonna play a game I like to call what the fuck is in my pocket
I have had my dick inside of entirely too many people at this wedding in order for me to be the groom. Please give me a swift kick in the dick to wake me up from this nightmare
Randomize
