pedialite and red bull = repair kit
I just realized I used lady gaga lyrics in my research paper on marie antoinette
No. one of us needs a degree and I am already the alcoholic friend. I can't do everything
Dear God. I kissed a man tonight who was born in 1936.
She threw all the patio furniture in the pool saying she was building a castle.
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
Although I love the reason it was done, can you maybe not show pictures of my dick to all your friends at parties? I like to present my penis in my own special way. thanks
Nothing like running into your favorite bartender in the middle of the afternoon while stone cold sober and being told your grabbed his penis the last time you were at his bar. My bad.
you took the tequila shot and then procceded to eat the lime..we told you to spit it out but you just straight face kept chomping
You showed them your nipple for dollars for the jukebox. You were depressed because only one of your songs played. Oh then you twisted your ankle and blamed it on your mad stripper skills.
No shame in my game.
think I signed up for a 5k last night while blackout.
He's against "violent sex" cause apparently my body is "sacred". Like dude I'm about to tell you about blowing your brother just so you'll fuck me like an animal Jesus Christ....
He kept screaming "I am the thunder!" when he was riding me.
I am far too sober to understand you right now. sorry.
And he put his penis in my face and I back handed it away.
Randomize
