i'm out of smokes so i just had an after sex popsicle. this might become an addiction.
Should I feel badly because I just bought a really hot pregnant girl a drink after I lit her cigarette?
He violated my cat. I was not impressed.
you cant keep talent like that locked up in a relationship
dude when im high using logic is an accomplishment that should be rewarded. make sure u get cinnamon twists
But mostly the blowjob in the airport bathroom was what I was laughing at.
wellllllll.... I literally just puked in my mouth so perhaps this is not the epic love connection I believed it to be 3 minutes ago.
It sounds like drunken magic sprinkled w narcotics
I think we've gotten passed awkward... the day I woke up at the palms and ur getting eaten out by the dude who just fucked me on the balcony.
He overslept for our prescheduled morning sex. The fact that my vagina isn't enough to get him out of bed was the last straw.
Adulthood is making your own puke bucket.
Well my normal tinder strategy of "Will I have sex with her when I'm sober" has been paying off
Quick question, did I crash teeth with you when I snogged you, or did I headbutt something between the car and the bed last night?
Lessons learned from last night: do not leave me drunk and alone with strippers and a credit card. Let's do whatever's cheaper.
That's the 3rd negative pregnancy test this month. I'm on a roll.
Randomize
