Seeing Harry Potter 3D stoned: Pro- giant redheads w/cute accents. Con-weeping for stoners who only had Pink Floyd laser shows.
U sang "shots, shots, shots" then walked 2 ur top drawer and threw socks everywhere singin "SOCKS, SOCKS, SOCKS!"
I think I might.. possibly.. like a Justin Bieber song.
I think you might... possibly... have sprouted a vagina.
So tasty. Tasty like a vagina with ninjas in it
czant get you from the arport. sry i found the rum. dan sucks at rumpong jusrt so yo knoqw.
I was just handed jelly beans by a guy in a penguin costume. Standby for confirmation on if they are actually drugs.
Lost my virginity in a banana suit. Glad I waited.
Oh my god I peed in a park last night and then tried to set off fireworks with a group of middle-aged men
my mom was by far the drunkest one there. best impromptu wednesday afternoon party ever
I just spent a pre-4th of july celebration riding in a raft being towed by a car through a town that I've never heard of handing out flyers for a river rafting company that I never knew existed. Good night.
Taco Bell. She just parked, got out of the car mid drive-thru, ran to the dumpsters, pissed, then ran back and drove up in the line.
You should probably stop your little brother from ruining thanksgiving. I just caught him trying to stuff a cake in a drawer... And now he's puking.
And I might have stolen a bag of Doritos out of Matt's car and hid them in my bag and gave individual chips out to people dancing, trying to convince people they were mini tacos.. Like why Am I allowed to be an adult
You don't know how much I love you. You could play Careless Whisper while we have sex and I'd still love you
I'm hearing voices and sirens. I'm scared. I heard a manatee out there.
Randomize
