before i could say "i'm not that kind of girl", i was.
So we've decided on 'hamburger' as your code for tonight. If you add ketchup or fries, we know the threat level has escalated.
the smoke from my cigarette strangely resembles what patrick swayzes ghost will look like.
the extent of background information i have on her is minimal, but it will get me in her pants
At what point in time did you think it was ok to jizz in my hair while I slept??
Around the time you told me my brothers dick was bigger.
You compared your dick to a twizzler. In no way, shape, or form is that a turn on.
You kept tellin the cashier that this order was "To Go" over and over...even tho we were in the drive-thru
I'm also 95% sure I had a conversation with someone on how hard it would be to jerk off with out opposable thumbs
remember our old mantra: why can't life be as easy as we are?
The cops said we could pay $250 or spend the night in jail and get 2 free meals. I might pee in mail-boxes more often
Dude how did you get resin on my keyboard?
it's not like this is the first time she's brought a guy home and I'm the one who hooks up with him
I'm sorry, you might have to start setting aside some time in your day for my pussy.
I was just dry heaving outside of the Chem building when a guided tour walked by. Welcome to the Maritimes kids...
If it makes you feel better he's in the stall next to me and I'm taking a diabolical shit. He's complaining
Randomize