We made it safely. Thanks for the call though.
Great. Don't do shady things like that ok?
But he was like 75 and lives right near mom and dad. Not a threat at all.
I'm playing musical beds - it's not very fun
Just got kicked in the balls by a girl in tap shoes. Fuck EVERYTHING
i knew i liked her after she chugged tequila, fell down the stairs and said "oh dont worry i knew it'd be faster this way"
She forced me to throw up so it would "rejuvenate" me. It worked and then we took six more shots and did a keg stand. You know what I call that? Friendship.
She was touching herself and looking a shoes online. My debt is bad enough without bringing that hot mess into my life.
Hungover. Have to fix everything I've broken. I'm gonna be very late.
So I was trying to finish off that sick uv whipped and I chased it with yogurt. Not a good idea
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
I told you that you should stop drinking and you responded "Thanks for telling me how to live, North Korea!"
For the first time in my life, I still have money by the next payday. Who is this responsible person and what have they done with the real me?
Don't worry dude, I've created a sex logic bomb to stop that sort of thing.
The dick lei will go down in squad history
How do I explain to work that I woke up in my underwear on a trampoline and that I'm not coming in?
Mandatory face masks - finally, a solution for lip augmentation failures and bad breath.
Randomize
