I don't believe these are real court rooms. They look absolutely nothing like law and order.
Will you be topless? That will affect my answer.
The dry cleaners wouldn't even take our clothes. That's how bad of a night it was.
Pretty sure I was rubbing Halloween candy all over my face and saying "these are my bitches."
Also- bikini mowing was a horrible idea. One truck just drove by 3 times, turning around at the end of the block each time. My tan may be better for it but my conscience has been raped.
Sorry about waking up naked in your bed this morning.
I ran into him drunk, barefoot, at rite aid and he said I looked "stunning." Yeah, Stunningly shitfaced haha
I guess I was blacked out I hopped a fence and hugged a cow that night.
I just remembered you petting my nose last night to help the cocaine 'sink in'. I don't think that's how it works
I have never encountered a chode in the wild
Pussy, Peanut Butter Cookies,and Bubble Wrap
NOT PREGNANT HIGH FIVE!
my near death experience doubled as my sexual awakening
you have to get here a cop came into the bar and she looks like Sarah Palin. I think I'm gonna try and bang her
JUST BECAUSE I ANSWER THE DOOR NAKED CARRYING A BOTTLE OF RUM DOESN'T MEAN YOU CAN STARE NEIGHBORS.
Randomize