I keep trying to leave, but for some reason I'm staying
dats a huuuuuge bitch!
who is this????
i just wanna soil my oats bro
see... this is why i put birth control in all my friends drinks
wait.... you do what?
Just saw the hottest 4 garbage men ever. They should make a calendar
i had confetti in my bra
i still find it in random places like a shoe or my car. that week haunts me
I'll just tell her I'm here with you picking out a buttplug for her to say "I'm sorry".
I don't think I even want to know why you are sending my husband pictures of your nutsack.
There should be a company that sends nadgrams. They're like candy grams except the recipient gets kicked in the balls.
By the way anyone who is willing to be in the film while tripping gets free shrooms.
The uberlube is also flammable
This time tomorrow I'll be fingering you
Oh shit a waiter was leaning over me when i opened that and i felt him pause
He's ninety percent amazing leader, brother, and teacher, and ten percent unforgivable douche. These are the men I look up to in my life.
I came home braless and wearing a tail....
sex on a trampoline, in the rain, on ecstasy, just thought you should know.
Randomize
