How would you go about getting a hold of the country star that you slept with and are now potentially pregnant with their baby...?
myspace Music?
I'm not saying I want a booty call. I just want what Cory and Topanga had.
It's going to be nice going to the airport without drugs taped to my balls like last year.
I just recycled a years worth of liquor bottles. I can feel my alcoholic carbon footprint shrinking
He left his umbrella behind in my bed to 'keep me company', then stole my front door key before he went to work
Is it too forward to say "stop being a good friend and start being a good fuck buddy"
I think it's awesome that you're getting shower sex advice from a Mormon.
Would you be mad if I just used the argument "I'm allowed to say that, my best friend is a lesbian"?
Never. I'm proud to help you win arguments.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
He was dressed as the 420 Easter bunny...he looked like a walking anti-drug campaign.
no we have a special triathlon I'm entering us in. drinking, fucking, and sleeping. I think we have a good shot.
CODE RED CODE RED MY VIBRATOR IS BROKEN THIS IS NOT A DRILL
I need a pedicure
You need to go to planned parenthood
Do you lock your house? Serious question, I need to know if I can add it to my list of emergency poop stops
This is not okay. I only like one boy. I should like 200 boys and be having wild unprecedented sex. Instead I like one boy whose a born again virgin.
Randomize
