She has some nice fakeys. She is also an exotic entrepreneur.
I'm pregaming with America's Best Dance Crew.
Do a shot everytime Lil' Mama mispronounces a word.
I had a dream once that juice was flowing out of my kitchen faucet
Just got to costco. Where are you?
Liquor aisle, bring another cart.
Totally about to meet up with Ryan in an empty parking lot. Expect to fuck him. Yes I know it's 3am. Slutty? Possibly. Excited? Damn right.
I miss seeing your mom and dad at church, well mostly just your mom... She used to hug my face into her boobs.
NoDDING MY HEAD LIKE uyuEAH MOViUNG MY HiPS LioKe YEAhhhhhhhhhhh
wow.
We started hooking up and a group of freshmen outside my window started chanting my name. Encouraging yet distracting
The best part of my day was getting high in the parking lot of the movie theater and taking pics in the photo booth with the caption "CONGRATULATIONS!" we geeked out because it congratulated us for getting high
Oh my god. I just RAN OVER a child. Oh my god this isnt my day. That kid was cool as fuck though
I'm sitting in my room naked waiting for him. When he gets here im going to make him do 20 pushups and lick my clit for a hour
dude, you declined head because you wanted to tell her about how you put cinnamon in your weed. also, we're low on Chef Boyardee
My roommate just caught me cleaning a tostitos queso jar with my hand and eating it. He didn't judge. Bonding moment.
Did I wash my face last night at your house? Where did my eyebrows go??
Knowing there are different types of spiders in different countries and regions makes me never want to travel.
Randomize
