So random guy from last night came over tonight. I told myself I wasn't going to sleep with him but he had some killer dirty talk and a big penis in his arsenal...what was I supposed to do? Supposedly he lost his virginity to his wife and since their divorce a year ago I'm the 1st girl he's slept with, I feel like I just re-took his virginity...I feel like a rockstar.
remember the good old days of high school when a half gal would last for more than a nite
so my doctor just swabbed my throat, and he looked up in suprise when i had no gag reflex. yea, he just judged me.
and then he started using my ass as a stressball
I cant do that to my vagina yet. its my prize posession.
he was wearing ninja turtle pajamas and he STILL got laid. who the fuck is this guy?!
EVERYONE IS SPEAKING SPANISH. I ONLY KNOW HOLA.
Is "when in doubt date the guy with the bigger dick" a good philosophy?
I'm sorry that throwing up fish and Jamaican Rum in the back of your dad's car ruined our friendship
I can still taste the Jäger. I'm gonna shoot myself.
Just laying in bed with my vibrator eating cold tortillas and listening to Savage Garden.
We had sex last night...... This "Friends" thing is going well.
now acid just makes me think of crab ragoon
Today is get drunk without showing anyone my penis day
He was eating me out on a picnic table on the frame lake trail and right after I came, a group of hikers walked around the corner. Stood up just in time
And this is one of the many reasons why you need a car.
Randomize
