i just realized that we are the poor version of bethenny and jill from real housewives... and I'm jill. this is a 6.5 on the depressing scale
at least we're not in new jersey
Maury Povich's contact info is in our database at work...i should steal it right?
I hope my sperm were as drunk as I was.
ambylanc
what?
there was an amgbulance. iw ish i was in it.
im not 100% but im pretty sure at some point i was rubbing ur bf's beard telling him how magnificient i thought it was
I think I was using my hair to catch my vomit last night.
You were.
I will call him whatever I please, including flaccid dick on forehead guy but not limited to watermelon cunt head.
I standby a snuggie being perfectly acceptable attire for drunkenly walking your dog at 5am. Our new neighbors did not seem to agree.
I got laughed at by a homeless guy in a Daniel Boone hat. I have no clue what this means for my day
The only thing I remember last night was feeding my dog 4 McDoubles.
The house hit rave levels when La Bamba came on which confuses me because I live in white suburban Canada
PARA BAILAR LA BAMBA ASSHOLES
Had to walk of shame past Westminster Abbey this morning. Pretty sure a Japanese tourist took a photo of me.
he can suck his own dick, i cant compete with that
Well you went to the bar with your crutches last night & everyone including the DJ started chanting "put your crutches in the air"
Yo did you say we are blacking out saturday night and playing dodgeball?
Yeah for relay for life. Its for cancer
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