I hraet yuo
did you say you heart me or hate me?
who is this?
i can juggle bunnies
cool
on fire
Hopefully the semester will be over before she has a breakout. Then I can just avoid the situation entirely
Drunk man just did a hand stand, fell over, knocked over a whole table of desserts, and didnt lose his cowboy hat. winner.
last thing I heard her say before I passed out was 'this is great. I never get to be the big spoon.'
Aw c'mon. You have to see if the spinning penis rumor is true.
He could tell i had a fever by feeling my tits. He gets docter of the year.
I just spent the last 30 mins playing uplifting songs to my uterus, & there's no way I'm pregnant.
Is it wrong in Austin to talk to the homeless while I feed a bird my chips??
That doesn't mean I'm a slut. Unless McFlurries are involved.
I will rub McFlurries all over you.
The video of him doing the dougie made me telling him I didn't want a relationship, just his virginity so much easier.
I threw up outside of a cab while waiting in a drive thru Mexican line while others who i don't know watched from their cars while they ate. Dinner and a show.
His favorite positions involve choking me out. I'm marrying him.
After the 2nd person threw up, you told us that your 'mint shooters' were just shots of mint mouthwash
You don’t need a wing man if you have a solid hook up on the pumpkin pie
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