Chicken burrito, or no deal.
Is that code for my vagina?
Who the fuck has ever referred to a vagina as a chicken burrito
I am pretty sure he just licked my hand while trying to sing goo goo dolls iris to me. Get me out of this state.
Decided to write a book called "girls don't poop and other myths I wish I still believed in"
He couldn't stand on his own, but he managed to somehow to get to the beer garden and get served 3 more. I'm proud to call him my cousin.
Of course he did. He is like the oprah winfrey for vaginas. Always giving that shit away.
You can't start the super bowl without starting a kitchen fire making cole slaw. Its unamerican.
I don't even want to know
That birthday blow job you ordered came in the mail today. I suggest you hurry home.
She is the absolute last thing I would want to screw. Honestly. Fellating a porcupine. Higher on the list.
Idk. I was speaking metaphorically. Go for it. As one of your bad decisions, I feel confident in saying you've done worse.
Is "sorry I booted you out mid-fuck last night" a good icebreaker?
Scary truckers and hobos. These are the men I attract
YOU MAKE ANAL SEX SOUND LIKE A SPORTING EVENT
Alvin just won tickets on the radio. I guess he's out of jail.
We knew it was an interesting night when we found my thong wrapped around a chocolate chip muffin in the fridge.
He's nice and all but I think I rather masturbate my way to happiness instead.
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