We walked 2 miles, legit 2 miles, and purchased 7 half gallons. One for each of us. Intense
no you're not listening to me HE WANTED TO BRAID MY HAIR
Oh well. haha. i couldn't really understand what she was saying. i just nodded a lot. i guesss she found that sexy.
gotta love spring break
gotta love slutty girls from the south
Your two fuck buddies playing ping pong together. HOW. ADORABLE!
There's a Russian guy here. In the bar. Drinking vodka. Wearing a trench coat and a hat and a mustache. Idk where the confusion is.
they need to invent a card that reads "thanks for all those boners you gave me that you did NOTHING about"
All I know is that I'm not gonna send out SOS messages via twitter for your rescue this time.
You described pouring milk in your strawberry cereal as a glittering magnificent water fall, skimming over the mountain and little strawberry citizens.
Did you hear about Miss Teen Delaware? From the snippet they played on the radio, I knew exactly what porn company it was from. Maybe I should cut back
she told me she wanted to fuck me because i was "rugged". if the definition of rugged is a lack of manscaping, slightly overweight, and pounding 16 oz pbrs, then yes i am rugged as fuck
Is using cherry lube as jam shameful or hilarious
It's days like today, when my bra and underwear match, that make me feel like I'm getting my life together...
That's a gentle way of saying I passed out like an 18-year-old on his first trip to Tijuana
This whole thing is fucking bullshit. I should be wasting all my hard-earned money at Planet Con this weekend but NOOOOOOOOO. Now I'll never get Roy Thomas to sign my comic
Can you cover for me after lunch? I’ve never seen a guy who cums as much as my new Side Dick so now I need to clean the house before my husband gets home
Randomize