we've progressed from teabagging to lighting eachothers asses on fire. this cannot be a good path.
a cemetary is a place for people to rest in peace and you just spermed all over their land
For future references, orgasms clear sinuses.
I decided to buy a keg of Miller Lite instead of paying the electric bill. Just thought I'd give you a heads up...
And we should impose a 'friends don't let friends order 25 shots at last call' rule
I'm stoned entirely off resin. Licking my blankets. Merry Christmas. Jesus died for our sins. Yay Jesus. I love you.
I have her designated blowjob hair tie on my wrist. It's like a key to eternal happiness
I wish my head, heart, dick, and nose could just agree on something for once
if memory serves, the guy you were hooking up with said he was a slutty skittle.
I think i should wear mittens next time we have sex.
Yep if he's taking selfies he's probably on drugs again.
I already left my house once this summer. Maybe we could do something in October.
plus like he's kinda a piece of shit. a beautiful somewhat talented piece of shit that hella needs to get his life together
I enjoy the company of your penis
Now I am free. And I want to go meet men. My phone deleted all my contacts, and I consider this to be a new beginning. With a new man in my phone book.
Randomize
