did you get engaged???
I am going to give you the keys to my place
Then I'll give you the keys to my heart
Gag me
I just got really nervous and swallowed all of my birth control
Making my coffee at work this morning let out a jack daniels fark. Turn around and see the quiet guy making his breakfast
why is jon gosselin on the news 24/7 for dating some new lady?? how bout I get on msnbc for not getting laid since forever ago
Who was that couple sleeping in your bed with us last night?
Well, I just hope you know I had your best interests at heart when I put your sandwich down my pants.
I HOPE YOURE READY TO KICK SOME SERIOUS ASS AT TRIVIA NIGHT TOMORROW NIGHT. also, i hope the birth of your niece goes well. BUT MOSTLY TRIVIA NIGHT.
Having my alarm go off at 3:30 makes me wanna rip my dick off and shove it through my eye socket
I told him he could fuck me once he could grow a beard. Never expected seeing him ten years later with a goatee and a great memory...
yesterday pre dick pic he said "no disrespect to your situation but i cant wait to get ahold of you again in the future" is this how people network??
If I can ever get control of my legs I will be home. Thanks... and again sorry about your bed.
He's interpretive dancing to Crazy by Britney Spears and expressing his feelings for either me or the guy next to us
I'm gonna snort this pill I found on the ground cause that's how classy I am. Watch football and eat Beef jerky. Domesticated at its finest.
I don't know what that means. Any of it. BUT I will be at your house at 10:20 and you better be ready to get high as balls.
Randomize
