2:23 am: come sit on my lap i have a stick that'll keep you in place
We had sex in his tahoe, talked about how we don't love each other and then high fived twice. Best Day Ever
people from other dorms came to marvel at the dump i took. i had a bio major take a picture.
I am far too drunk to be making a tuna melt . There's blood EVERYWHERE.
My foreign exchange student got here today. I turned on man vs. food and told her that "this is all you need to know about America."
I'm not sure where but someone shit somewhere in the house
this girl is having heart failure because she lost her feather...a gypsy blessed it in turkey. Not sure im high enough for this
I'm having a self conscious moment and I need your complete honest opinion of my boobs.
don't ever tell me how terrible your next walk of shame is until you run into your little brother on his way to class.
Well it's been 24 hours and I still feel like a mammoth sat on my balls
I sent him a pic of my tits and he said "Word." I need a drink.
Finally washing the shoe scuff marks off my front windshield :( bye bye memories
if you come you're not allowed to wear pants. if you arrive wearing pants you won't be wearing them long.
I shouldn't be drunk at 3 pm but alas, here we are...
I almost got an A in organic chem but started hallucinating during the final so I got a C
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