Walking by Farrand Field is better than a porno right now.
is it a bad sign that i now think of my run-ins with cops as "skill building seminars"?
um, yeah. i think it is.
dude, the summer is killing me. i just woke up cause my balls were stuck to HER leg!
Man, the last time I saw you you were giving me a thumbs up while being pulled out the bar by your belt from some girl.
you humped every kiosk in the store. then you asked for an application.
Everytime I see a couple on campus walking and holding hands I just want to yell he's gonna lie!
Well the pizza delivery man was either startled or incredibly intrigued to see me skateboarding in the living room by myself at 1 in the morning in ripped pantyhose
This might be the most awkward night of my life. And I had someone pee on me once.
I never thought your mom would see me throwing up on my hands and knees in your front yard
Omg it was awesome. At one point she says "cum in me, I'm too old to get pregnant".
Moments after comforting her about her boyfriend issues I found myself in the other room showing him my tits.
And your boyfriend doesn't mind you constantly taking pictures of his dick just to freak out your brother?
its more like he's accepted that he can't stop me
Seriously? People are paying $45 for Surge?!? I've seen better one night stand decisions being made then the choices being made on amazon orders of Surge
Would you accept a fantastic blowjob as payment?
It's not even 8:30a, wine glass is broken, there's sugar everywhere, and your mom just asked me what MILF means.
Randomize
