Oh yes. The girl who wanted me to watch her pee.
when I woke up she was standing in the living room with a bottle of scotch because she is "allergic to hangovers"
Oh this totally just became legit. My "boss" is puking outside my car right now. I win again.
Hulk Hogan has now convinced 2 women to marry him & I have yet to have a successful or healthy relationship. I am officially depressed.
Whatever is fine with me, as long as I am dressed in green and end up shitfaced.
And i laid in the yard with carrots on my chest cause i wanted a bunny
He used one end of the towel to wipe the cum and I used the other end to wipe the tears
I dont know if this is a good time to tell you but im actually a freshman.. not a senior
That's like the cock version of a mortal kombat fatality.
It's 2pm, and I just had to pass a guy in the turning lane because he was driving down Main Street in an electric wheelchair pulling a flatbed trailer with 2 of his buddies in it and they were all drunk holding beers.
Pretty sure at some point last night i said to myself "it'll be fun to completely lose my mind for a night"
How about this: I support you through your miserable marriage, and you support me through all my anonymous sex?
He left cushions on my floor, chocolate on my bra and unexplained scratches on my thighs. I think this one might get a second date.
Was I trying to make a threesome happen again?!
Yep
I need to stop doing that, Im gonna get punched in the face
Not gonna make it. His stripper neighbors are playing a Super Bowl drinking game that involves removing my clothes
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