But do you think a lot of ppl use facebook as a masturbation supplement to porn?
Let me make clear that I am not a facebook masturbator
The sky will open, cue choir of angels: "oh! wow! Matt was right! Not only will I grow out my bush, but I'm going to date straight, available men!"
She acts like you when your on meds
She acts like batman?
mike has just informed me of all the things he would put in his pussy if he was a woman. this includes door stops, power drills & g.i. joes.
"and then my dad would be all like 'hey mike, where's the remote?'"
That's the last time I try to be adventurous at a gas station
It's official. Every single female in their late teens and early 20s get their fb statuses from a pool of cliched "quotes" which all say, without saying, "boys treat me like shit, I know they do, but one day I'll find 'the guy' who will treat me right no matter how psychotic I am." Vom.
If I send you a picture of the guy passed out in the bath tub, will u be able to identify him?
I mean you would really have to try to not have fun at a party that doesn't require pants....
she comes in perfect pitch. hook up with more singers.
I swear to god if you keep eating my cats food drunk I am going to kick you out of our apartment.
I'm not getting off this floor. I love this floor
So? Find me, fuck me, then you can go to sleep and I'll leave.
Wow. That's the most amazing thing anyone has ever said to me.
well you're talking to a woman who had glorious sex less than 24 hrs ago so my opinion is biased.
i buy too many watermelons when I'm drunk
So I ended the trip with two cold sores, poison ivy on my leg and vagina, and no alcohol or weed. WORST. 4TH. OF. JULY. EVER.
Randomize
