You kept yelling that her vagina looked like a hatchet wound.
I didn't know people actually cried after sex.
the orgasm was like being thrown to the other end of reality, so getting a nosebleed from it wasnt too upsetting at that point
I've started bribing my dorm's security guard with cookies so that he doesn't tell all the boys i'm hooking up with about each other.
Just threw up in the MSO airport men's room. We're at that point this morning.
I can't promise that. They just put an extra shot in my margarita.
Celebrated the veterans I suppose, my mouth tastes of gin and black outs
All I know is that at 4 am I was walking down the street in my bra and his shorts and Im pretty sure I passed my grandma on her morning walk.
The night went downhill when he took his pants off at our table and walked up to women saying "Special delivery"
As he was cumming he yelled "Yahtzee" then said im free to go. Thats my one night stand
He was only in jail for 4 hours before he was someone's prison wife
I went in for a high five.. He went in for a kiss.. Today is a good day
Howd it go?
Well we had the "no we're not fucking on the porch" conversation but then we totally fucked on the porch. So I'd say alright.
At what point in a new hookup do you tell the guy you need to wear a mouth guard when you sleepover because of your TMJ? Asking for a friend.
I like how I can go from sucking dick in the my basement to singing along to veggie tales with my family in a span of 10 minutes.
Randomize
