You know your creepy when you look at recently tagged facebook photos of girls you want to hook up with and they include prom pictures
Should I shave my pubes in the shape of a top hat so I can nickname my junk Abe Lincoln?
the girl I was having sex with just mumbled victory for msu during sex. i love basketball season
he legitimately fell asleep standing up at the club. everyone was impressed
Just pooped at the strip club. NOT NORMAL . I may be a little too comfortable here.
Can we put your name for the shipping address for penis ice luge?
That dog was the best thing i ever touched
I feel like I was eaten by a coyote, then shit over a cliff...
Caleb has a beard comb now. Also I have a pube comb now too. May or may not be related incidents
He was "hot guy in the dark". One of us had to sleep with him. I took the bullet you're welcome.
You wrote me a check. For zero dollars. For my soul. Dick.
I plan to get very, very drunk when I get off work.
But doesn't your shift end at like noon?
I don't think you understand.
Oh and yeah that does count as public urination.
I'm fucking blazing boy. 5hr weed sauce kicked in and my entire face feels like an 8ball of gold bond flying down a mountain of Fresh powder. Just gliding.
We walking to the game and some random guy came up to to me and yelled "hey you're the whiskey guy!" And then high fived me then walked away
Randomize
