on a scale of 1-10how much freaking out is acceptable if you just found a (possibly used) cock ring in the head board that your parents gave you?
i thought to myself 'what a productive day'. then i realized all ive done is one load of laundry and shaved my balls.
Nothing good has ever or will ever come from 50 cent beers at the bowling alley..
I made a drinking game out of watching your DUI video, everytime you say " okay, well thats just your opinion"
i screwed him while his gf was puking in the shower. 2011 is looking up already
i threw up in a box in my own lap driving today.
Your excessive judging is making this uncomfortable
After 13 tally marks I wrote the number 4,000 and made u sign my arm to prove it.
Dunno. My heart says "no", my brain says "maybe" and my dick says "YES YES FOR THE LOVE OF GOD YES!!"
He threw up on my head while I was blowing him, and then I started barfing, and the kitchen floor was a mess. Believe me, he will never, ever live this down.
Showed up 15 minutes late and curtsied when I entered the door if that puts perspective to how my first day is going
At the end of the night i was really thirsty and tied to a bedpost
They walked into the house to see me in my neon pink knee high socks trying to pull you out of the cat carrier by your legs...
I told her I wanted to go swimming and she responded with jello shots, taking off her clothes, and jumping into the pool...I think I'm in love
I'm basically doing the Walk of Shame without the added bonus of having sex last night. That doesn't look good on anyone.
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