are you going to last longer than 15 seconds
nope
Tostitos scoops are the best shotglasses ever. Eat it after as a chaser.
If you bang a chick other than your girlfriend while playing tiger woods on xbox I wonder if an accomplishment would come up...
I had to sleep with my math professor to pass algebra. Apparently my blowjobs are only C+ quality
Were playing bathroom attendees at the party and making people wash their hands
i made a dollar
So I am just swinging blind here, but I am guessing that blood in your sinus is not ideal
THAT DOESN'T MEAN YOU SHOULD LET ME CHUG VODKA.
New bet. First person to fuck their girlfriend and narrate the whole thing in Morgan freemans voice wins. You are disqualified if she asks you about. My girlfriend is on her rag. U have the headstart. Your move...
Drinking gin at a party, riding a giant inflatable walrus all around the living room.
Youre attempt to ruin my night by putting Date Rape by Sublime on my sex playlist failed. She was into it.
"Wine night with the girls" turned into me having to set an alarm in the bathtub this morning...
I hate being the only medical professional in the group. I always end up patching you guys or being the DD when I'm on call. I have problems I need to drown in booze too...
i came home after a long day at work and she dropped a plate of cheesecake and a bottle of whiskey in front of me and said here's dinner
Quit giving me a hard time, whens the last time you got head every night? Cougars are where its at they dont play games
I told the cop I was late for a booty call. He still gave me a ticket but he wrote his number on it
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