hey babe thanks for tonight, it was fun.
to be honest, i wanna fuck your friend.
I thought I had fell out of his trailer but he says I tried to ninja kick his TV stand saying those girls hula hooping were trying to seduce him. There wasn't anyone else there.
just got drunk at a party with Christmas themed solo cups.. holidays are officially here.
i just snorted my name. best moment ever
ITS DAYLIGHT SAVINGS TIME SUNDAY EVERYTHING IS GOING TO BE OK AFTER ALL
Thursday nights need to stop happening to me.
It's been decided..lingerie is an investment. You get free breakfast and cab rides out of it.
Dude that bathroom stall was not tall enough to be doing lines in, guys kept peeking over and giving us high fives
Woke up Christmas Eve morning with my face smelling like ballsack.. No regrets.
For the sake of my mom, I can't sleep with two guys with the same name. She has a hard enough time keeping up as it is
You were in the girls bathroom yelling at some random chick because you thought she stole all the urinals. That's why you were kicked out.
I kinda wanna drive through the Gator bar parking lot and seeing if my panties are on they ground, they should be right next to my pride...
Um I got a ride home from the bar with two random boys and one tried to bang me on my parents riding mower
I think we might need a safe word for this...
Grabbed the cop's ass and he still arrested Heather instead. Victory is mine!!
Randomize
