So explain to me again how you wake up next to a Brazilian model and I wake up next to a turkey sub? And a jar of grey poupon.
words cant express how excited I am to make January 1st our own personal version of The Hangover
I miss your penis. And I totally say this as a friend. I just miss it because it's great. You should be very proud of it.
it's like her boobs came off with her bra
Dude we need to petition the city about running buses later, none of my booty calls own cars
You were too busy being proud of your penis shaped pancakes to notice...
All I know is I had a penis in one hand a bottle of wine in the other
Stoned ambition #8. Must learn sign language.
He was going down on me and raised up for a minute, slipped and punched me in the face. My lady boner left immediately.
There's cereal in my underwear. Was I in your apartment at any time last night? That's the only logical explanation for this.
YOUR DICK HAS BEEN IN ME I DO NOT WANT TO BE SET UP TO MEET YOUR FRIENDS
You'll pass into the great gay beyond
Where it rains cosmopolitans and scantily clad gogo dancers of all genders direct traffic
But I put cranberries and apples in my wine so it's festive drinking not suicidal drinking
Well hell, he's gotta sleep in the bed he's made. Multiple times. For multiple girls I'm sure.
I'd like to know who hasn't seen my tits tonight.
Randomize
