So there are ramen noodles in the shower you need to explain...
some 7 year old just told me his favorite rapper was eminem and kim got what she deserved...god damn today's youth is in a dark period
Sex should be hot, sweaty, messy, and a little painful. At no point should it involve tiny rocks
my neighbors are having lesbo sex right now.
I'm on my way.
I maybe just had sex outside in broad daylight. At a state park. Please be proud.
There is a mirror in the headboard of the bed that I'm sleeping in so I can immediately question life choices when I wake up.
I'll pay you to write the paper but not for sex. You should only get paid for something you work hard at.
his butt looks cute in my panties so i decided he has to wear panties all the time from now on.
Now that I'm sober, I'm realizing you put your name in my phone as "wowww"
fuck you I'm eating salad I can't be drunk.
Let's just say his oral game was lacking. Hell, lacking is too nice of a word to describe it.
I wanna riverboat gamble on your vaginal waters. Just sayin
It true. It written in the Bible.
Yes I remember that, right next to the passage where jesus said unto his disciples, pop molly, fuck bitches amen
On the good side I got hit on by a cute college guy. But the bad side was having sex in a frat house for first time in 9 years
I mean...if Marco gets pregnant, it is either the spawn of Satan or the second coming of Christ (neither of which I want in my life). So let's just hope that he doesn't grow a womb and that we don't have to consider either option.
Randomize
