I am puke
No, computers are like whores. moody bitches that cost too much and no matter how much protection you have you can still get a virus
I just criticized a porno's use of editing. Film school is ruining me.
merry christmas to all and to all I give the mystery rash.
I just sneezed and it made my entire body ache. Hungover is an understatement
I'm gonna make some noodles and go to bed. Hopefully I don't fall into the stove or something.
My head feels like Jesus is projectile vomiting hammers on it
I tried to twerk on a barn in 3 inch heels at a party last night and nose dived into mud. These were all new friends. I'm probably not allowed back. Cool.
Also, you should've bet on Team Liver.
We won.
USA USA USA
i just looked at those "hey" messages and i was so confused and then i remembered we were practicing texting with our tongues.
dude, she has my telletubby sweats and my good sweatshirt hostage, I can't risk their safety with a breakup
Its a good night when you make $200 and didn't have to see any balls
Few clarical questions about last night: 1. How did we get home? 2. Am I wearing your underwear? 3. Where is Andrea? 4. Guy with nose ring last night hot?
1. You tried hitch hiking "like a pro" and flashed cars while sticking out your thumb until I called Michael. 2. I don't know but probably. 3. Who is Andrea? 4. Hot.
at the hospital. Kevin drank straight from the river
she gave me a ride on the back of her motor scooter and i swooned so hard
omg it's like all of your grease 2 fantasies come true i'm so happy for you
Randomize
